Horror Movie Podcast Ep. 048: HMP Goes Weekly, The Lazarus Effect (2015) and BillChete’s Top 10 Horror Movies of 2014

HMP Frankensteinian 48

Welcome to Episode 048 of HORROR MOVIE PODCAST, where we’re Dead Serious About Horror Movies… In this monumental Frankensteinian episode, your host Jay of the Dead gives about 12 minutes of huge announcements. It’s big and exciting news, but if you want to skip all that stuff, just use the time codes in the show notes below. After the announcement, Jay welcomes special guest BillChete of the Horror On The Go to hear his TOP 10 HORROR MOVIES OF 2014, followed by a Feature Review of The Lazarus Effect with BillChete. Join us!

[Even more breaking news: As of April 1, 2015, all of BillChete’s episodes from Horror On The Go are now freely available on the Internet!]

Horror Movie Podcast is a weekly show that’s released every Friday. If you’d like to support our show, please subscribe to our podcast free in iTunes, and leave us a review! And remember, we love getting your voice mails, so call in with more recommendations and comments at this number: (801) 382-8789 Thanks for listening to Horror Movie Podcast!


SHOW NOTES:

I. Introduction


[ 0:01:18 ] II. BIG NEWS FOR HORROR MOVIE PODCAST


[ 0:13:45 ] III. BILLCHETE’S TOP 10 HORROR MOVIES OF 2014


[ 1:39:38 ] IV. Feature Review: THE LAZARUS EFFECT (2015) with special guest BillChete
Jay of the Dead = 4.5 ( Low-priority Redbox Rental )
BillChete = 3.3 ( Avoid )


V. Wrap-Up / Plugs / Ending


JOIN US NEXT FRIDAY ON HMP: Episode 049 on Friday, April 10, 2015!


NOTE FOR NEWCOMERS: If you love this podcast, there are 36 episodes of two other great podcasts that precede this one. Just scroll back through our archives, or use the links in the sidebar on the right.

Leave a comment or e-mail us here: HorrorMoviePodcast@gmail.com

LINKS FOR THIS EPISODE:

Links for BillChete:
Hear BillChete’s show FREELY ON THE INTERNET HERE: Horror On The Go.com
On Twitter: @BillChete

Dr. Walking Dead on Twitter: @DrWalkingDead
Dr. Walking Dead’s books American Zombie Gothic and Triumph of The Walking Dead

Wolfman Josh’s links:
Wolfman Josh on Twitter: @IcarusArts
Wolfman Josh covers new releases in theaters on: Movie Podcast Weekly
Wolfman covers movies streaming online on: Movie Stream Cast

Dr. Shock’s links:
Dr. Shock’s daily movie review Web site: DVD Infatuation.com
Dr. Shock on Twitter: @DVDinfatuation
Dr. Shock’s other horror podcast: Land of the Creeps

Jay of the Dead’s links:
Jay of the Dead and Horror Movie Podcast Official Twitter: @HorrorMovieCast
Jay of the Dead covers new releases in theaters on: Movie Podcast Weekly
And if you’d like to e-mail Jay of the Dead with a good Beastly Freaks recommendation: BeastlyFreaks@gmail.com

You can always contact us by e-mailing HorrorMoviePodcast@gmail.com. Or you can call and leave us a voice mail at: (801) 382-8789. And you can leave us a comment in the show notes for this episode.

Special thanks goes out to singer-songwriter Frederick Ingram for the use of his music for Horror Movie Podcast.

If you like Horror Movie Podcast, please subscribe and leave us a review in iTunes. If you want to support the show, we have PayPal buttons on our sister site, Movie Podcast Weekly.com, in the right-hand sidebar where you can make a one-time donation or you can become a recurring donor for just $2 per month. (Every little bit helps!)

Thanks for listening, and join us again next Friday for HORROR MOVIE PODCAST!

Jay of the Dead


88 thoughts on “Horror Movie Podcast Ep. 048: HMP Goes Weekly, The Lazarus Effect (2015) and BillChete’s Top 10 Horror Movies of 2014

  1. Weekly? Hmmmm… don’t get me wrong, more HMP is definitely a good thing. Do I want a new episode every week? Heck yeah. But, I just worry that you’ll burn yourself out, JOTD. I’m more than willing to wait every other week for a new episode if it means this wonderful show will persist. The last thing we want is for HMP to share the same fate as TWHMP or HM.

    To be fair, I haven’t listened to the episode yet, so I could be way off-base. Maybe I should reserve judgment and skepticism until I hear the words coming out of JOTD’s mouth!

    • That was my initial worry too Dino, especially considering how much pressure the Friday the 13th shows seemed to cause, but I’m listening to the podcast now and it sounds as though they’ve got this pretty well planned out and one of Jay’s stipulations is that they can take a week off if they really need it.

      Generally I’m old and angry and scared of change and I love this podcast as it is but a HMP episode every week is a concept not to be sniffed at. I think the momentum in the comments for the franchise episodes was in part due to the frequency of releases and I’m hoping it means we get more themed episodes per year, which cannot in any way be a bad thing.

      It’s just like when my friend John had a sex change. I was scared at first but when I realised I could have sex with John even more regularly than before I started to see the up side.

      • @David – Yep, that caveat about taking a week off when needed actually made me let out a sigh of relief. It’s bound to happen from time to time, so I’m glad JOTD will let himself off the hook for the occasional break.

    • I’m with Dino, Jay. I believe in you, but I’m afraid for you and your sanity. I’m also concerned about the quality of the show and even though I’m sure that you know what you’re doing, I wouldn’t want this show to become a watered down version of itself. We all know that releasing on time is important for you, but I rather you took your time and release a quality product than rush an episode just to get it out on time. I’m a firm believer of quality over quantity and I’m sure you are too, but I’m just voicing my concerns, which I hope you don’t take as complaining.

      About Billchete’s top ten list, I think it’s pretty solid and very unlike him, which makes it a very interesting list. I’m so glad that he’s changing because in all honesty and with all the respect that he deserves, I couldn’t stand his reviews haha. Don’t get me wrong, I love the guy, I love the way he battles with other hosts and he’s just very entertaining to listen to. Anyway, I surprisingly watched 10 of the movies on his list (including honorable mentions), so that makes me think that I didn’t do such a bad job watching horror last year.

      I do have a bone to pick with Mr. Billchete. He gave Jay a bunch of crap about scoring the Babadook a 10 and how his score was more personal than subjective and yet he’s always championing The Texas Chainsaw Massacre as not only the greatest horror movie of all time, but THE best movie of all time. Come on now, that’s not subjective at all. The Texas Chainsaw Massacre is a fine movie, but it’s no masterpiece by any stretch of the imagination. It’s not even in my top ten horror movies of all time. Billchete also said something along the lines of The Babadook never becoming a classic. What?! The movie just came out last year bro. Let it simmer for a bit before making that call. The Texas Chainsaw has had 40 years to gain the following that it has today. For him to compare the two is quite unfair. In 40 years, when The Babadook has had the time to build up an audience, we’ll see if his comments ring true. But my money’s on The Babadook.

    • Thanks for your great feedback, my friends. I understand and appreciate your concerns. And I respect that they come from a place of genuine concern for the longevity of this podcast and for me. That’s classy.

      But allow ol’ Jay of the Dead to quell your fears a little… We record on a weekly basis, anyway — for at least 2 hours at a time, each week.

      So, for 18 months now, each bi-weekly episode release was comprised of at least 4 hours of recordings (usually more) that needed to be “blended together” in editing (an awful process). Sometimes awkwardly, as you have heard…

      But having literally one day to edit 4+ hours was killing me. Hence the late releases…

      So, I realized that if I would just edit each week’s two-hour recording session, then we could have a weekly horror podcast again!

      As weird and as counter-intuitive as it sounds, in many ways, a weekly release is actually easier for me to produce, due to the unwieldiness of those giant, bi-weekly episodes. (Watching the content in a week’s time is another matter, however…)

      Admittedly, one concern is legitimate: I can foresee weeks where we don’t have much to talk about at all, due to the limited preparation time. Perhaps there will be a week where we haven’t seen much at all. That may be. But here’s my pledge: I will not water down or stretch out 30 minutes worth of content just for the sake of having a two-hour release. If all we can bring you is one good 20-minute review of something, then so be it. But it will be good for the whole 20 minutes.

      Honestly, though, any time Wolfman Josh, Dr. Shock and I get on Skype to record HMP, we could easily talk for hours. And we do. I just want to channel our long-winded, cinematic obsessiveness into a quality, weekly horror podcast.

      Improvements are coming to Movie Podcast Weekly, as well. It is my flagship, after all. Though, HMP is literally four times more popular!

      These podcasts need to be worthy of their listeners. And thus far, we’re not there yet. But I assure you, we’re working on it.

      Thanks for listening.

      Sincerely,
      Jay of the Dead Serious About Horror Movies…

      • “I just want to channel our long-winded, cinematic obsessiveness into a quality, weekly horror podcast.”

        Everything you’ve said here sounds great Jay although the above quote stirs me to point out that your “long-winded, cinematic obsessiveness” shouldn’t be lightly dismissed. There’s nothing I love more than hearing the hosts turning over every stone and exploring every tangential topic. I do have faith that you can pull this weekly thing off though

          • Maybe being longwinded and obsessive has gotten a bad rap recently but personally I’m all for it too. If it’s the opposite of being short and having no interests then it’s good stuff in my book!

      • Just to alleviate some of your fears with regards to the announcement:

        Thus far, Jay has approached the show’s new “weekly” concept about as well as anyone possibly could. We already have a couple more episodes “in the can”, and having them done so far in advance takes the pressure off of Jay, allowing him more time to edit and release each one.

        As for content, I can pretty much guarantee you that, thus far, none of us have reeled in our “long-winded, cinematic obsessiveness”. And while I can’t speak for my co-hosts, I’ll tell you that I have no intention of ever doing so. I greatly enjoy the time we spend recording these shows (despite the late hours), and our conversations are a big reason why. I agree with you all that, without them, HMP wouldn’t be the same, for you OR for me.

        So expect me to ramble on just as incessantly in the future as I’ve done in the past!

        And thanks for all the excellent feedback. I don’t get a chance to come over here and comment as often as I would like, but know that we all appreciate your commitment to the show. It really does add to the overall experience.

        • @Dr. Shock – I’m never concerned about lack of content to discuss when it comes to you, given your insanely comprehensive knowledge base of horror movies (or, movies in general). The three of you also have good conversational chemistry, which is part of the magic.

          I know you said you aren’t on here as much as you’d like, but I’ve noticed you making cameo appearances on the comments board lately. It’s always nice to see you around.

          Speaking of “seeing you around” (in a totally non-creepy way), what part of Jersey do you normally visit when going to the shore? Ocean City, Wildwood, Avalon? I grew up just off exit 30 of the Parkway, so spent the better part of my childhood bombing around OC.

          • I agree with Dino, it’s always great to see Dr. Shock show up in the comments.

          • Dino: Thank you, sir, for the kind words. They are appreciated!

            We actually visit two different shore points each year, In June, we spend an extended weekend (Friday to Tuesday) in Wildwood, and this July, we’ll be in Ocean City for a week (we normally go down in August, but we’re staying at a different house this year, and that month wasn’t available. It’s not far from 36th street).

            Can’t wait for summer!

          • @Dr. Shock – Wow, what a small world! Ocean City was my stomping grounds throughout childhood. I grew up surfing those beaches, and playing miniature golf and eating at Manco & Manco pizza on the boardwalk. My first summer job was actually as a lifeguard at the OC Waterpark just off 7th St.

            Good times.

        • Sounds like I may be the most worried about the “big change” but part of that is because I prize the “long-winded cinematic obsessiveness” of the themed episodes and don’t really care for the Frankensteinian episodes.

      • @JOTD – After listening to the episode and reading your comments here, it sounds like a win-win situation. Seems like this has been well thought out, as should be expected from you. I hope reality plays out to plan.

        This is very exciting!

      • @JOTD – Btw, even before you mentioned it in this episode, I noticed you stepping up your game lately with the comments board activity. Email responsiveness… well, that’s a different story. 😉

        I do wonder sometimes if my various emails were just sucked up into an alternate universe.

  2. Oh Jay, you just had to bring up “Godzilla” again didn’t you…

    When will you “Godzilla” (2014) haters actually go back and watch the original movie? Just like the the most recent entry in the franchise the original is far from the endless shots of Godzilla smashing things and fighting other monsters that all the critics of the 2014 version seem to have wanted to see.

    These complaints are akin to saying that the “Friday the 13th” remake sucks because it’s just a deformed guy killing people in the woods and you went in expecting Jason to be a body snatching demon-worm or a space-faring cyborg.

    • David,
      Shaky cam aside, “Cloverfield” was essentially a modern “Godzilla” movie done right. We get to see the monster frequently enough that we remember it’s a monster movie, but not so much that we get sick of it or bored by it.

      The drama (and therefore, the action) in “Cloverfield” stems from the characters’ predicament, in relation to the monster’s rampage. The new “Godzilla” begins as though it’s going to follow suit, but they forgot to write a story and characters to inhabit said story.

      Consider the structure of “Aliens.” Characters are marooned in a place where they need to travel to certain points while trying to “avoid any Imperial entanglements” with the monster.

      “Cloverfield” did this well. “Godzilla” (2014) failed with his chubby thighs and fat tail.

      JOTD

      • Come on Jay. Godzilla had way more screen time in the new movie than the monster in “Cloverfield”. I do like “Cloverfield” (in spite of the fact that I’m not keen on found-footage) and I’d agree that the characters in that movie are more compelling than the charisma-vacuum we got as a lead in “Godzilla” but for giant monster action there’s no comparison. Even though I’ve argued that “Godzilla” 2014’s surplus of dialogue and character scenes is in no way at odds with the roots of the franchise I’m still comfortable stating that it gives us way more moments of titanic creatures smashing stuff than “Cloverfield” does. And there’s a genuine breathtaking sense of scale and menace to all those scenes too (which I feel might have been lost had we been shown more of that sort of stuff).

        I do agree with your criticisms of the story and characters in “Godzilla” 2014 to an extent (although I loved every minute of Bryan Cranston) and to be honest I’d rather have seen the first half hour expanded into a full 90 minute film because story-wise it definitely does lose track a bit in the later acts but I still thought the good outweighed the bad, especially for that kind of mainstream blockbuster type film. It’s so much better than crap like the “Transformers” movies.

        I’m curious if you’ve revisited the new “Godzilla” since that first viewing Jay? Maybe you’d be surprised that there’s more monster action than you initially gave it credit for.

        • >David on April 3, 2015 at 1:01 pm said:
          “…Godzilla had way more screen time in the new movie than the monster in ‘Cloverfield’…”

          @David – I don’t want to speak for JOTD, but I think that’s exactly the point. In GODZILLA (2014), we see the monsters so frequently throughout the film that the magic of seeing them wears thin as the movie progresses. In CLOVERFIELD, we see the monster throughout, but only indirectly – from a distance, partially, etc. More often, we see what the monster is capable of rather than the monster itself. It isn’t until the final climactic scenes that we really get a good look at Clover, which makes those shots extremely effective and exciting.

          I know CLOVERFIELD wasn’t part of the original discussion on this podcast episode, but just to continue the comparison here, another thing the movie does so well is conveying this feeling of being trapped. In GODZILLA, the movie spans different parts of the world, and it feels like you could get away from Godzilla and the other monsters if you wanted to. In CLOVERFIELD, the movie is contained within Manhattan, and you really get the feeling that you can’t get off that island no matter how hard you try. And, even though Manhattan is a big island with lots of nooks and crannies, you can’t even really hide because if the big monster doesn’t get you, the parasites will find you. Between the two films, the stakes in CLOVERFIELD are much higher; you truly are trapped… and screwed.

          Don’t get me wrong, I enjoyed GODZILLA enough to give it a 7.5/10, and it landed on my top 10 horror list for 2014 (I think that was more a function of me not seeing a lot of 2014 horror, though). It’s a fun popcorn movie that’s nice to look at, but it definitely suffers in its story construct and execution.

          • I’ll give you the points on structure re: Cloverfield. That was well put, Dino.

            And yes, the film benefits from the inclusion of Lizzy Caplan and TJ Miller, but Godzilla does have Bryan Cranston, Ken Watanabe, and Elizabeth Olsen. Aaron Taylor-Johnson is not at his best here, but the rest of the Cloverfield cast is every bit the joy-sucking “charisma vacuum” as Semper Fi Kick Ass is here.

            Talk about hating a creature design, though. Godzilla is beautiful, chubby or not. Big is beautiful, Jason. The Cloverfield monster is so unappealing to look at. JJ Abrams has continually lowered the movie monster bar. They are usually the worst part of his movies, in my opinion. From Cloverfield to the splayed vagina monster in Star Trek to the Cloverfield reboot in Super 8. Let’s not even talk about the smoke monster in Lost. Abrams just plain sucks at monsters. In fact, every one of the Kaiju in Pacific Rim are better than every one of Abrams’ creations. And Godzilla 2014 is better than all of the Kaiju. Call him chubby if you must be a sizest, but he’s still the king of the modern movie monster.

          • @Wolfman Josh – I actually like the character design of Clover. It’s extremely off-putting and gangly. That said, I like the 2014 Godzilla, too. I’m in the “it’s perfect the way it is” camp; I don’t think he’s too chubby at all. And, yes, the kaiju in PACIFIC RIM are all awesome. Still, I would say I prefer Clover’s look above all.

            I guess beauty is in the eye of the beholder… or maybe I’m just really easy to please when it comes to monster design!

          • I agree with Josh regarding the monster designs. One of my favourite things about monsters as a concept is that they can all be different and totally unique looking characters. So I’m sick of seeing that same spidery, reptilian video gamey looking thing turn up in every other movie I watch. Is it just that this generation of creature concept artists are far less imaginative than their predecessors?

          • Sorry Dino, I’m with Josh and David on the monster design. I think J.J. Abram’s movies suffer from weak monster design. But I have to agree with Dino in that Cloverfield is superior to Godzilla. There’s no denying that the Godzilla design—even if chubby by people’s standards—is a classic one and it’s miles ahead of most monsters. It was also clear that the fight at the end of Godzilla made for some truly entertaining and hair raising moments that even at its peak, Cloverfield couldn’t match. The only downside was that the rest of the movie suffered from the premature death of who should’ve been the main star and drama so dry that I might have as well been watching paint dry. Cloverfield on the other hand, had it’s drama act together (even if a bit shallow), and unpredictable cases of motion sickness aside, the movie delivered on its premise and made us feel the kind of tension that a big monster situation would make us feel in real life. And the most important thing of all is that it maintained this sense of chaos and tension throughout the duration of the movie. Godzilla on the other hand tried to build things up and I don’t know that it ever really took off.

          • >Juan on April 6, 2015 at 12:32 pm said:
            “…It was also clear that the fight at the end of Godzilla made for some truly entertaining and hair raising moments that even at its peak, Cloverfield couldn’t match…”

            @Juan – I’m a little confused by this part of your comment. To start, I wholeheartedly disagree. For me, there isn’t a single part of GODZILLA that really succeeds in creating suspense or tension. Entertaining? Sure, in a popcorn, summer blockbuster kind of way. But there are several scenes throughout CLOVERFIELD that blow it out of the water in terms of “hair raising moments.” I’m confused, also, because you seem to contradict yourself with the rest of your comment. I *think* you’re saying CLOVERFIELD is the more successful monster movie, so your comment about it not being able to match GODZILLA’s finale threw me off.

            @Wolfman Josh, David, and Juan – I guess we’ll have to agree to disagree. Like I said, I don’t dislike Godzilla’s character design. I think this latest iteration is probably my favorite Godzilla, and it’s great. But, for me, I prefer the character design of Clover – its look, its movement, its behavior, everything about it is just much scarier and more effective to me as a modern movie monster.

          • @Dino

            Ok, what I tried to say was this: Cloverfield is the better movie. Godzilla’s climactic fight, however, is so awesome that it stumped all over Cloverfield but just for the duration of that scene. Hair raising moments could mean anything, really, but what I was referring to was the moment when Godzilla finally unleashed his mighty atomic breath. THAT was a hair raising moment that had me literally standing up and unless my memory is failing me, I don’t think Cloverfield had anything near that level of excitement.

            Sorry about the confusion. A lot of the time I type from my phone and it’s kind of hard to keep up with what I’m writing.

          • @Juan – I think my main cause for confusion was a combination of my (still) wholeheartedly disagreeing with your point about the climactic scene in GODZILLA vs. CLOVERFIELD mixed with a 550 ML bottle of Yorkshire Stingo. In both instances, you’re to blame. 😉

        • I guess he means second tier in the pantheon of classic horror monsters. First tier probably being Dracula, Frankenstein’s Monster, The Wolfman and The Mummy.

          I guess other entries in the second tier might be The Invisible Man, The Creature from the Black Lagoon, The Romero Zombie etc. but it’s all up for debate really. It’d be another interesting discussion/argument for a themed episode actually.

  3. Guys! Netflix has all of the Leprechaun movies streaming right now! EEEEKKK!!! I think it’s time for that Leprechaun franchise episode that we’ve all been craving for. Also, Netflix added Saw I-IV last month and the month before it was the Friday the 13th movies. I like this trend. I wonder what franchise will be available for streaming next month. Here’s to the Alien franchise!

      • At least it was well-timed with our coverage. They must’ve been thinking the same thing we were. Wait, you just rewatched ALL of them, Dino! What do you need them streaming for now? For someone who loves them so much, you should probably just buy the discs or the downloads. Man. You really DO have a F13th problem. Do we need an intervention?

        • Ha, I was thinking the same thing about it being well-timed with the HMP franchise coverage. I actually do have the “From Crystal Lake to Manhattan” box set of parts I-VIII (the ones that were streaming), but it’s so much easier to just pick up the Apple TV remote and fire them up on Netflix.

          p.s. Intervention is probably needed. If I’m being honest, though, I was ready to move on from F13 towards the end of the franchise coverage. So much good horror to discuss, so little time.

    • Are you trying to kill our friends on HMP by making them kill themselves?

      One should never wish a Leprechaun series marathon on anyone! What did they do to deserve that?!

      • Haha I assume that you mean kill themselves out of overcoming joy. Either that or you’re not a fan… never mind, I just read your second sentence haha. Well, it’s an “acquired taste” I suppose. I don’t know. I enjoy them :/

  4. This is probably my favourite guest appearance by BillChete yet on this show, and only partially due to his epiphanous turn. I missed Doc and Josh but this was still a really fun episode. Great stuff guys!

  5. I’ve realized with the things I’ve been going through the last two months that time is the most important thing that we have…we aren’t promised tomorrow…all we have is today…I would rather talk to my best friends and loved ones every day than wait weeks at a time not knowing when the next time will be…if ever…this is how I feel about this family…I am happy and thankful for HMP going weekly…I have faith in Jay and that things will be just fine…

  6. Hi there again guys. Over the last few weeks I’ve been attempting to broaden my perspectives on modern horror a little. The majority of the stuff I’ve been watching has been in the supernatural/ghost sub-genre and for the most part I’ve been pleasantly surprised. Of course modern horror is far from being devoid of certain shortcomings so here’s a couple of (not-so) mini reviews that demonstrate the good and the bad. I’ll hopefully have a few more posted soon too. Sorry for the protracted nature and poor quality of the writing but I’m still recovering from some kind of brain-cell disabling virus.

    The Canal (2014)
    This was a release from last year that I was pretty excited about. I love a good supernatural thriller, I always enjoy when movies refer to the medium of film itself (the main character here has a job as a Film Archivist) and there’s something I can’t quite put my finger on that is kind of troubling and creepy about murky urban waterways. So my hopes were high and I’m happy to say I wasn’t let down. Sure there’s nothing totally original here, we’ve seen most of these elements before and the conceit of a protagonist whose situation as a victim of supernatural forces/extreme psychological problems is ambiguous to both himself and the audience is admittedly a bit of a cliché at this point. This film does all of that stuff very well though; it’s slow and suspenseful, has an unrelentingly grim atmosphere and pulls off some disturbingly surreal and genuinely terrifying moments. It also doesn’t pull any punches at all. This is definitely what might be considered a “serious horror film” and I felt aptly shaken when it was all over. 7.5/10

    The Messengers
    Now this one I was a little more dubious about. I love “The Eye” so the involvement of the Pang Brothers was what initially got me interested. But then there’s Kristen Stewart. “Oh well” I thought “maybe her eerie lack of any recognisable human characteristic will lend itself well to a horror film”. That last sentence might not have been a real question but the answer is still a resounding “No”.

    True to form the Pang Brothers do deliver some pretty creepy imagery. In fact I’d go as far as saying that most of the scares in this movie are visually pretty good, so it’s truly sad that these moments of flare are invariably shat upon by some of the loudest, most ear-splittingly obnoxious stabs of jump-scare music that I’ve heard in a long time. Seriously, this was just ridiculous; I was watching this flick late at night so I had to keep turning it down for fear of waking the whole street but the jump-scare moments were so loud that when turned down to a volume that didn’t distort my speakers the dialogue scenes were subsequently rendered almost silent. This is just inexcusable to me. Yes, some jerk popping a balloon next to my ear will make me jump. No, that doesn’t make said jerk a master of horror story-telling. It makes him a jerk.

    There were other problems too, not least of which was Kristen Stewart’s portrayal of a human girl possessed by a house brick. The worst scene though came towards the end (MINOR SPOILER ALERT) when the parents of Stewart’s character manage to pull her out of what looked like a pool of sewage full of ghosts. She’d been pulled in by the obvious-twist-villain who himself had been pulled in by a bunch of horrible spectres. So what do the family of our protagonist do once they’ve rescued her? Get the hell away from that pool of sewage full of ghosts and a crazy guy who at any minute might reach out and pull her back in? Of course not, instead we get an overhead shot of them having a group hug while standing precariously close to the sewage pool. It’s almost as though the camera angle is demonstrating how willing our characters are to stand only millimetres away from certain death. Maybe that’s the real twist here. The people you were supposed to be rooting for were morons all along. 3.5/10

    • These are great mini-reviews, David. You’ve definitely piqued my interest in THE CANAL, and I’m going to add that close to the top of my queue. You pretty much had me at “murky urban waterways.” The end of your review for THE MESSENGERS also made me chuckle a bit. Your dry wit always seems to hit the mark.

      I do think it’s interesting that you talked significantly more about the movie you disliked than the one you were recommending. I’m interpreting that as you not wanting to give anything away from THE CANAL, which means it must be good.

      • “I do think it’s interesting that you talked significantly more about the movie you disliked than the one you were recommending. I’m interpreting that as you not wanting to give anything away from THE CANAL, which means it must be good.”

        It would be nice to think that might be a subconscious element but I think in truth it’s more to do with my being a rambling and cynical curmudgeon. I just like complaining a lot.

          • Alright! I’m with you 100% on The Canal, although my score of it is a tad higher. The thing that struck me the most was the imagery and how the sound worked with it to really amplify the tension. The colors were so in-your-face that it was almost like they were stabbing at my eyes while the sound and music were pulsating the insides of my ears. Then, when both senses’ stimulations arrived at the brain at the same exact moment it would cause an implosion that turned to pure fear and tension. The final moments of the film are as horror as you can get. Both visceral and psychological, The Canal manages to get both ends of the spectrum working together quite harmoniously. And that ending is a straight punch to the gut. I really enjoyed this and had I seen it in time, it would’ve made my year’s end list. It’s a 9 for me. It could go higher over the years.

            There’s another movie that’s streaming on Netflix that also impressed me quite a bit. It’s called Honeymoon and I think it’s on the same level as The Canal in my opinion. You guys should give it a try. it’s an 8.5 for me and I think it’s definitely worth your time.

          • Your reviews made me want to bring back my mini-reviews, David. I kind of miss writing those. They weren’t anywhere as introspective as yours or the hosts’, but they were fun and easily digestible I think (I hope) haha.

          • Juan, I definitely think “The Canal” is a movie that could very easily climb into even higher ratings after another few viewings. I thought the use of colour was almost Argento-esque and I agree that the ending is definitely a punch in the gut. Very effective and pleasantly uncompromising.

          • I love “The Canal”! Very Shinning-esque with a touch of Amityville. In my top 10 of 2014!

          • Ok, THE CANAL has just moved up to #2 on my queue. It’s just behind THE HONEYMOON, which has been on my queue ever since JOTD first mentioned it on HMP last year.

  7. YES WEEKLY EPISODES!!!!! On what David was sayin bout Godzilla, THANK YOU!! I absolutely love the 2014 Godzilala. I understand Bill Chete not liking it as he is not a Godzilla fan, but even people who claim to be complain about the amount of exposition in the new one, when honestly the majority of the Toho films are exactly the same. It’s always “I think Gozillas back, let’s try the military. Wait that doesn’t work? Ok well we’re working on a new weapon, oh yeah btw there’s another monster on the loose.” 20 minutes left, the big G and Mothra, or Ghidorah, or whoever have it out for roughly 12-15 minutes and then only Godzilla is left. “Oh wait we have this new weapon let’s kill Godzilla…well I think he’s dead he went back into the Sea of Japan. Wait is that a roar I hear?” It was no different of a movie than Giant Monsters All Out Attack, or VS Biollante, or even VS Desotroyah!! If you’re not a fan of Godzilla, and even some of us who are, yeah it can get a bit dry in parts, but that’s what they were going for. To make an American Godzilla true to the Toho series. Unlike the 98 Zilla that was more or less Independence Day vs The Lost World:Jurassic Park. I can’t say too many negative things about it though as it did get me into Godzilla at the age of 8. Bill Chete if you want a non stop destruction/action Godzilla movie, check out Godzilla: Final Wars (2004)

    Was very glad to finally hear bout The Lazarus Effect, I figured it’d be kind of “meh” but honestly I’ll probably see it any just for Olivia Wylde lol. I absolutely loved her in The Incredible Burt Wonderstone and am anxious to see her in this, much as I watched Deliver us From Evil mainly for Olivia Munn..hmm I’m seeing a pattern with Olivia’s here lol. Keep up the great work guys!!!! Can’t wait to hear these weekly shows, as well as a Nightmare on Elm Street franchise review and hopefully the classic Universal Monsters!!!

    • Fritz, you defended Godzilla perfectly. Wish I’d made those points as well.

      And I’m seeing Lazarus Effect just for Mark Duplass!

      Dr. Shock has something special planned for our Universal Monsters coverage. It should be a lot of fun.

      I’m not sure when we’ll get around to Nightmare on Elm Street. So many other themed shows planned. But, we will do it eventually!

  8. Sounds good to me, as you can tell by my screen name I’m a big fan of he Universal Monsters Series! Can’t wait to see what yall have in store

  9. @Wolfman Josh – Nice touch with the Frankenstein head for the episode artwork. Is that going to be a visual cue for Frankensteinian episodes moving forward?

  10. It’s an Easter miracle HMP is weekly!

    Do you know when you’ll be doing a review for “Spring”? I watched it this past weekend, and while I thoroughly enjoyed it, in the back of my mind I had the old “is this a horror movie” debate. Beautifully shot and the story is interesting. There are some horror elements. Some of them kind reminded me of John Carpenters “The Thing”. But for a nearly 2 hour film not enough.

  11. Did anyone else have a little chuckle when BillChete was arguing with JOTD over the release date of ANIMAL (2014)? The whole time I was thinking to myself, “dude, JOTD, just tell him you already watched the movie last year.”

      • Über annoying talking couple aside, that was dope bro. My brain is fired up. I can’t wait to discuss this. David, you need to see this. I think you’ll really appreciate it.

        • Oh man, I can’t wait to discuss. Sucks that your theater experience was less than stellar, but glad you were able to see it in theaters (and before the HMP coverage).

  12. Now that it’s Thursday I can really get behind this new weekly approach. A new episode tomorrow is just what I need.

  13. Oh man, I had hot coffee come out my nose after laughing during Jay’s list of historical character horror movies–Susan B. Anthony, holy hell that was good.

    I love the news, personally, and I loved this episode too. More and more I find myself wondering how my top ten horrors would match up against Jay’s list.

    Horns, as Stephen King’s son’s story, could have been something. Could have been.

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